Tuesday, August 05, 2014

11 men that women should avoid.

There is something very indefinable about men. They are equally confusing as they blame us to be. I am a 34 year old woman. I have had a fair share of crushes, infatuations, affairs until I found that man who loved to get irritated and irritate both at the same time. So, I feel I am experienced enough to tell all the young, single-hoping-to-mingle ladies the kind of men they should immediately say good bye to. Hope you enjoy reading it...

1. The Pontifical’s - They have a pompous air of infallibility. They are insolent, opinionated and dictatorial. Try arguing with them. You will almost feel sorry for people who have to bear with these jokers day-in and day-out. Their full of vain, puffed-up, overblown speech about how good they are or how right they are, rest are all wrong- are good enough a sign to start running for your life. I know girls they sound like a Mills and Boon hero but to be honest no one can have a happily-ever-after with these kinds of men.

2. The Vain- Imagine a man who spends more time in front of the mirror than you do. Who would look at every reflection of his beautiful face, the way we look at Hugh Jackman or Bradley Cooper. Who would carry a pocket comb and after every 15-20 minutes he would comb his hair. Even while driving, his side view mirrors and rear view mirrors are positioned strategically that he could look at his handsome face every second or may be third minute. All he talks about are hair gels, skin cream and how women go weak in the knees when they see him. I say run.... as fast as you can.

3. The Show-offs - Nobody likes showy people. These people look happy... who possesses gadgets or things that we could only desire but if you look closer they seem to be screaming "Did you notice me". So next time when you meet a man who is using his left hand more because he is wearing a Rolex watch or is fidgeting with his phone because he is carrying an I phone 5S or S5 whatever that is. Pity that man.

4. Tied to mommy's apron strings- I think it's nice to respect your mom. But If this man let's mommy make all decisions for him...ranging from which course he should take to what friends he should hang-out with to which colour under-wear he should wear....darling's he is definitely bad news. 

5. Miser Mister - I have a friend is who going out with a guy since last 3-4 years. She said this guy doesn’t believe in anniversaries, Valentine’s Day or even celebrating birthdays. Since they work in the same office (the guy is better placed than her) they have their lunch together. While footing the bill he insists on splitting it 50/50. Call me ol'fashioned but I feel once in a while footing the bill is pretty cool and even gentlemanly.

6. Knight in distress - If the man is scared of creepy animals and rodents it's pretty understandable. But scared to go alone after midnight or to check the door is definitely not manly. I know a person who screamed "Please take my wife" when his friends played a prank on him in a dimly lit lane... that too in front of his wife. We don't want that...do we???

7. Friend-crazy - This is the most difficult to put forth. Friends are very important. They are a healthy way to fill up the space in your relationships. But for few men friends are everything... they tend to fill the spaces with girl friends and wives, while major chunk of their lives and free time is still reserved for friends. 

8. Flirtatious - These are the men are mommies and daddies have been warning us about. They are like pied piper, they just have to whistle or look or even smile and we happily melt into their arms and follow them, trusting our lives in that care less hands. They have a unique gift of making you feel special. Very soon you will know he is flirty with every woman he meets. And the best part is he acts like it's no big deal. After learning that will you still feel special????

9. Clingy - Imagine a man who says "I miss you" every minute, who is all over your social network- almost liked every status and every pic you have posted , Will and you text messages at unearthly hours or will call u up at least 10-15 times in an hour. They might seem like a love-struck pup but do you remember Darr starring SRK and Juhi it's something like that. You definitely don't want to be in that mess.

10. The Over-critical - This species finds everything wrong with their partner. From the way their girl stands -the way they do their hair- to the way they talk- laugh. They just can't seem to stop comparing their women with 10 different women. Their favourite line would be "You know when my mum was your age..." "My mom makes amazing food" "Why can't you be more like XYZ..... or mum" Trust me you don't need these kind of men.

And lastly,

11. The Opposites- What I am about to say is my first hand experience. Before I start, I really want to know who came up with that crap "Opposites Attract" I really want to kill that man or a woman, whoever they are. Opposites do not attract...they repel. Imagine loving to socialize and your partner is a loner...hates crowd. He swooning over gazals all you love is those dhin chak bollywood songs. He loving fine-dining and you are a street food lover. He loves to watch CNBC and you are FRIENDS and big bang theory fan. Do I need to say more...?