Wednesday, October 10, 2012

MOVING ON IN LIFE : a funny concept








I m having a hard time understanding the concept of "moving on in life". U actually don't really move on. You just condition your brain..to keep that thing or the person in the darkest side of ur conscious level..till it becomes a habit. But what happens when u see that person or the thing again???? Its then you realize u never really moved on.....u are right there...feeling the same thing..:(

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Last evening, I met my ex-boyfriend. He was shopping with his Girlfriend. I was running after my daughter Kavya when i bumped into him. We both recognized the moment we saw each other. There was a wide-eyed amazement in both our eyes.He introduced me to his girlfriend.She was frail looking, impeccably dressed and hand feet manicured /pediured ...whtever it is...make-up tastefully done. She too was a Banker."Exactly the kind he liked" I thought ruefully.

I knew i looked shabby..with hair standing in all direction. Wearing my 12 yr old most comfortable pair of jeans and a round neck t-shirt....sans make up...unluckily that very moment i realized i haven't had my eyebrows plucked since last couple of months (wow there goes my confidence)..forget the pedicures and manicures..that would be luxury.

I noticed they both looked amazing together. The kind you see on page 3. I was a wee-bit jealous....okk let me correct.....i was extra ordinarily jealous. I should have been holding that remarkable ....greek god looking man's hand.

 My husband came calling me..I introduced him to my husband and we exchanged numbers and then they left. 

He's been on my mind since then.The old memories came rushing to me.No matter how much i fought it...everything in minutest detail i remembered (and i thought i had moved on...what a pity). The time he proposed.... Our evenings in hobby center and how he hated lemon soda with salt..everything and the reason why we really broke-off. We fought over a guy, who used to work with me, then we chose to never see each other again. After few months, he called up to say that he was moving to Boston but i ignored his call.... then he SMSed me and told me about his plan. I chose not to return back the call(okk i agree i am an idiot). We never spoke after that.

Even after 9 yrs ..... he still loooks amazing. He hasn't aged a bit. As I was thinking about him, I get a call and I see  its his ( my exbfs) number. I take his call. Well it seems he too was thinking about me. He told me the exact same things that i thought about him...that I haven't changed a bit, haven't aged a bit, looked very pretty( well i m not sure...if he was telling the truth). He asked me..if I could meet him all alone someday and catch up on old times.

I really used to think we both had "moved on in life". But in reality we didn't. We were still on that old block and feeling the same thing. 

I thought for a bit...I looked at my husband...who was happily watching TV. I realized i am still attracted to my exboyfriend and I guess the feeling is the same as it was 9 years back. But my status wasn't same anymore..i was married to a man....who was remarkable in his own cute,adorable way. So I politely declined the offer and went to my husband...and slept hugging him. I know that my ex boy frnd was still there in some corner of my brain... will continue to be there for the rest of my life.... there is def.ly "no moving on" happening as far as i can see. :( 

28 comments:

  1. Power of history !!! BTW you look beautiful & pretty. Perhaps you don't need any make-up.

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  2. Mmm! Nicely done, Renu! Loved it. My 2 bits abt moving on - it is not about totally forgetting but about leaving behind the bitterness or regret or any other such negativity! And that your character has done - so, yes, she has moved on!

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    1. Suresh "moving on in life"...according to me means that the person stops affecting the way he/she does...u cld look at that person without having 1000 things going in ur head... In short...."you are unaffected...untouched by his/her charms and the way they loook...smile..talk......list goes on...:)

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    2. I agree with Suresh here. Moving on is when know and acknowledge that you had a relation, acknowledge the good times and you don't regret it but at the same time also know and acknolwedge that you made decisions which led to where you are today and you're happy for that. And I liked how your character made decisions in the present :)

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  3. Beautiful narration of a slice of life as it happens!

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  4. Hi Renu,
    Is this Fiction? (Sometimes Truth is Stranger than Fiction)
    Beautifully written - narrated in a peppy style.
    You write very well with a youthful witty style.
    Waiting for the next part (in case this is fiction...!!!)
    Keep Writing such wonderful pieces on your blog.
    Regards
    Vikram
    PS - This post made my day!

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  5. Ye adbhut write up hai, poetry jaisa. aap kamaal ho.

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  6. Nice story. The fact that you had to assert this is a fiction itself speaks for the effect of the story. Congrats.

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  7. i can say this is good short story....

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  8. Nice write up :)The whole point of never fading that attraction you felt for him & vice versa , was wonderfully depicted. Piece of fiction is better than reality i guess. hehe thanks take care!

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  9. You write so well. And on topic I love to read :)

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  10. By the way, moving on means geographically...LOL

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    1. wellll.....absolutely... but i see most of people using d term "i have moved on" also in d matters of heart ;)

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  11. o! o! o! again a fiction but it doesnt seem like one Renu...
    and I jus loved this expression: " ....who was remarkable in his own cute,adorable way. So I politely declined the offer and went to my husband...and slept hugging him."

    especially "and slept hugging him"...

    gr8!!!

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  12. very nicely written
    yup right we never really move on
    we just learn to live without them

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  13. Will you rewrite my love story. I hate how it has turned out of late. The temptress stole the heart of my love now my soul longs for darkness.

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  14. First of all beautifully Written as everybody has already mentioned ...my comments will make not much big difference .

    though uninvited but wud still like to comment,its all because of the grace of ur writing that made me think for a while and write..

    Question is of course not about reality & Fiction , question is over the authenticity of Phrase " Moving On " ...i too felt from a long time that this is the most overrated phrase without any genuine meaning used most often...

    How could anybody just erase & rewrite the past ..well i think nobody could ...everything that happens afterwards is just the extension and shaped by the event or a moment ...All lie in the supernatural words like "Choices & Belief" almost similar to the concept of believing or not believing in Existence of God.i'v always thought Its all about our choices and our belief in them.All that matters afterwards is the strength you acheive by your belief which eventually effects your choice and prepares u for living with it. how dominative could be your one choice over the other...but really , u r right fictionally or Practically there is no moving on...i never ever have found somebody supporting the idea of "not moving on" & thats what brought me you towards your Blog...once again lovely and seems to be unacceptably realistic as this is what our conscious do to our subconscious while burying and getting over it .. i mean the whole process of moving on..

    Pleasure reading ur Post

    Pranshul

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    1. i totally agree with you said. Keep visiting. :)

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